You have probably heard about it and if you have become curious you can get started as a beginner with BDSM with these tips.


Start with BDSM

The success of BDSM starts with good preparation. What you want to do and how you do it is important. Do take it easy and discover what BDSM has to offer you. Openness and honesty play an important role in this, so that you know what each other's preferences are.

For beginners we advise to start with soft BDSM. Here you can see to what extent you like this and take small steps each time. In the beginning it will be very weird to start with BDSM. It immediately seems scary or radical, while it doesn't have to be.

Safety

To keep BDSM fun and safe, safety comes first. Take into account the four Vs of trust, voluntariness, security and reason. In everything you do, think carefully about whether there are risks and try to exclude them as much as possible.

Always do the activities with the consent of the other. Choose a stop word, with which you indicate that you want to stop immediately and no longer like the game. This way it remains pleasant for both and you can enjoy it in a safe way.

The first time BDSM

When you start with BDSM for the first time, it is not wise to immediately start with extreme toys or games. Agree together a division of roles of dom or sub (master and slave) and you can also alternate this if necessary.

By starting slowly you get to know BDSM in a playful way and you can go one step further each time. To help you with this, we have a number of starting options.

Bondage: For example, you can start with bondage. This is all about limiting the freedom of movement and dominating the other.

Spanking: Another option is spanking. Hitting the buttocks, for example. This can be done with a whip, but also with your hand.

Blindfold: Limit your vision with a blindfold or eye mask. Be surprised and surrender completely to the other. Your other senses become extra sharp.

Assignments: Come up with exciting assignments and show who's the boss. Punish for disobedience.

BDSM toys

In a BDSM game there are different toys to use, of course, depending on your wishes.

With bondage, a bondage set is useful for the beginning BDSM. An ideal package with which you can explore your limits. Especially if you are looking for something new or exciting, it is good to start with this.

This way you have the option to bind yourself or your partner with it. A bondage set usually contains bondage material such as handcuffs or rope and sometimes also with blindfolds or whips.

As a beginner you can often always find something that suits you in bondage with such a BDSM set. This way you will also find out whether bondage is really something for you and it is also easy to use.

Trust is extremely important, because the one who is tied is completely at the mercy of the other. In this way you will get an introduction to the world of BDSM as a beginner!

Discover your kinky side

Secretly, there are a lot more people kinky than they actually seem. And with the film series Fifty Shades of Gray, BDSM has been stimulated by a large audience.

At first it can be scary and intimidating and many often do not dare to do it. Discovering your kinky side can be extra exciting and provide extra tension for you and your partner.

If you're used to "regular" sex, experimenting with BDSM is a big change.

By gradually adding BDSM elements during sex, you always take a step and you can soon enough notice whether this appeals to you. That way you will soon enough notice whether BDSM is something for you.

Before you actually start it is good to learn more about what you want in BDSM.

There are different types of graduations and shapes and the best way to find out is to obtain information yourself. Countless information can be found on the internet. This way you find out what seems kinky to you and you make a start to discover your kinky side.

How do you start?

When you start with a BDSM session, it is nice to have everything prepared first.

In the preparation you will determine together what you are going to do and how the distribution is. You also clearly agree with each other what the boundaries are. Communication is the basis for this.

When you have done the preparation, it is simply just a try! If you are involved in a role play, do not act, because that does not turn anyone off.

To ensure that both parties (you and your partner) enjoy BDSM, it is important to keep thinking about each other so that you don't go too far. Especially if you have the dominant role.

Are you ready to start with BDSM as a beginner? Discover a new world that opens up as a novice BDSM and maybe being kinky is something for you too. Still looking for a partner for a kinky sex? Check out our BDSM dating section.